good friends rock...

...and they know exactly when you need a Starbucks Iced Mocha Frappuccino and to have their smiling face show up simply because they actually value spending time with you. Thanks JB - you have an uncanny way of knowing exactly what I need when I need it.

I've been having trouble coming up with topics to write about recently because the current "issue" in my life is not something I think I can write about here anymore. When our children are infants, our focus becomes so necessarily narrow that mommies find their topics of conversation have become embarrassingly devoted to diapers and other poop-related activities which then later evolves into nuances of breastfeeding and baby food and cry-it-out versus attachment parenting and microscopic analysis of every step, every milestone. Pre-children, I swore I would never fall to that level but you'd better believe that I did in the end (so sorry dear friends). I think it's both inevitable and annoying. I'm on an email list of moms who have children that were born around the same time as my son, and we've shared minute details of their daily lives for the past (nearly) 12 years on a very regular basis. We've discussed every physical ailment, every event, every clever joke and every touching or embarrassing moment. It's a very close, honest and unique community with the ultimate connection - our children. It's a safe place to show our mom colors. I've used this blog to share things in my children's life, albeit not as personal as I get with my "list moms."

At some point in time, though, I have to realize that my son, my pre-teen son, is a private individual. We've crossed the fuzzy line between some perceived ownership of "my child" to respect for this "independent person." I don't feel comfortable anymore writing publicly about things that are going on in his life. It's not fair to him, and is incredibly selfish of me. However, I'm *acutely* feeling the personal loss of that outlet. I still talk IRL to close friends about issues that I need help resolving, but I don't feel like it's something I can or should record publicly anymore. (And I do realize that it's not so much of general public interest either, despite my tendency to believe the universe revolves around my children). This is a big, big loss for me. I am much better at expressing things in writing than I am orally.

This is just another nuance along the path of watching my children grow up. So while this is hard for me it's the right thing for my son. He's evolving into this person - this amazing person - and he deserves the respect granted by privacy. Even from his mother. I will, however, always retain the right to kiss the top of his head (as long as I can reach it) and pinch his nose.

I *can* share that Q will be participating in Model UN this coming weekend, much to the delight of his Uncle JC down at Florida International University, who was a career Model UN participant. Q will be an ambassador for Sweden. He was originally slated for the "peaceful use of space" committee as a representative from Somalia, but his teacher learned that, well, since Somalia really doesn't have much of a space technology program at this point (duh) since there other more critical things for them to be concerned with right now, Q would be better off as a Swede on the World Health Organization committee. I'm not sure if I can slip into the conference to watch. DH and others have looked at me in horror when I've wondered aloud about this. What? I think it would be very interesting!!!

I swear that I am moving into a better place now and will be back to posting about interesting topics soon. Wait for that pendulum to swing...it's rocketing back, I swear.