it takes a village to make a life

It's christmas eve morning, and the house is relatively peaceful so I feel like I should spend some time composing an incredibly beautiful and thoughtful post to send out to my world of people - something to just blow you all away with its wisdom and caring and such, but those brain juices are having problems turning on, you know? I'll simply say that I am thinking of you all this christmas, and am ... thankful. Your individual marks on me make my life what it is. You're my peeps, I love you, and you rock my world.

I thought this "merry christmas" versus "happy holiday" thing was mildly funny. But now it's bumming me out. It's bringing out much ugliness. Maybe I'm naive, but I like to imagine that at holiday time, at least, the best of people filters up. I'm not ready for a giant group hug, but smiles and gentle spirits and good wishes are part of this time of year, for me. I was in line at Farm Fresh and the cashier wished the lady in line in front of me a merry christmas. "Yes...YES!!!!" the lady spurted out. "Thank you! I am REFUSING to say anything else. M.E.R.R.Y. C.H.R.I.S.T.M.A.S.!!!!!" (which spewed forth from her mouth coated in venom and judgement and hatefulness). I breathed in deeply and rolled my eyes, which the cashier happened to see. So when it was my turn, she eyed me with distrust, and as she handed me my receipt, she said "MERRY CHRISTMAS" quite deliberately. I said "Thank you," I smiled, and left.

So by opening up my arms wide to embrace the religious celebrations of christmas, hanukkah, winter solstice, and the secular celebrations centered around the new year and all the good feelings and hopes for peace and kindness in the world, by wishing the world a happy holiday season, I have become offensive. It's not even an argument of "You're not recognizing my religious beliefs", but one of "You're not respecting my religious beliefs because you recognize there are others as well." Can you BE more intolerant? I am not offended if people wish me a Merry Christmas...nor a Happy Solstice, or a Happy Hanakkah. I don't understand the vitriol in all this. "Take my religion - take it IN YOUR FACE - there you are, you have a MERRY CHRISTMAS so there." Thank you.

It can just make me sad, which is why I surround myself this time of year with people I understand and love and I pretend that my world is all that there is. My kids are singing in the choir this afternoon at the christmas eve services at UU. After that, a great big bunch of us will be be communing together over at David and Deborah's house. It's become our tradition to do this every year (thanks to Deborah and David for opening up their house!). We'll celebrate with delicious hors d'overs and wine, and the children will run wild in their playroom while we adults talk and talk and talk and talk and talk. Tomorrow afternoon, we'll walk down to B and K's house for another great big huge christmas day dinner, again with a big bunch of friends (many of the same ones) and tons of food and drink, and we'll celebrate together again. And then the next day we fly out to Texas to spend the week with my family.

In the words of Alfred Tennyson: "I am part of all that I have met"
So in my world, it's all good.

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